The Idea Of Romantic Love Essay -- essays research papers

We are brought up on romantic love. Is this true in your experience? If so write a paper on which you first define this amorphous concept and then discuss how you came about it. For eg. Have you been influenced by media, T.V., movies in particular. Conclude by stating whether you believe in romantic love or have cast of the idea. â€Å"I don’t care what you think, when he comes I’ll leave and won’t even turn back and look at you, he’ll love me, he won’t be like you†¦Ã¢â‚¬  Words spoken by me when I was barely 10 years of age. I was addressing my mother after we’d had an argument and referring to the arrival of my prince charming who would understand all my dilemmas and make life ‘heaven’ for me. Such is the perception of romantic love that I formed ever since I began to realize the dynamics of the relationship between a man and woman. It is what is fed to us through nursery rhymes, and fairytales and it is a world that we do not wish to leave for fear of abandonment and loneliness. As we progress through life we are constantly exposed to the likes of television serials, movies and of course ‘mills & boon’ romances, all aimed at reinforcing the very first impressions of bliss that we formed with regard to the loved one and love life in general. Infact, falling in love with a handsome young prince and galloping away with him into a hazy, peach orange sunset, is a romantic concept that most young girls, irrespective of race or background, embrace and ultimately grow up to anticipate. They are taught that it is a magical paradise where they will have all of their needs met - and live happily-ever-after. They are taught that getting the romance is the goal and that after that everything is smooth sailing. Romantic love is thus an emotion surrounded by myths and metaphors, motivated by false hopes and the desire for a guarantee that somehow, a miserable life can be turned into happiness at a single stroke. Obviously that is not how it works in reality. Robert Solomon once remarked, â€Å"Love has become an obscure ideal, like TV ads, full of promise of something fabulous yet to come, hinted at but never spoken of as such.† We are told that we can we are in love by the we feel; the giddy disorientation, shaky, shivering hands, and your heart leaping within you. Unfortunately, these are also the warning signs of dengue fever, so it’s always a good idea to check with your do... ... romantic feelings to emerge before they initiate romantic activities. But it works the other way around! I personally would not cast of the idea of ‘romantic love’ as such because I believe that romantic love is powerful, but at the same time it is not omnipotent. Doubts, fears, insecurities, weak self-esteem, and silence can prevent its achievement. The problem lies not in the concept of romantic love but in the impossible demands made in its name. To be love is to realize that in the authentic relationship each person stands by his own perceptions. Sometimes its okay to go by the clichà ©s, which facilitate togetherness, but if it becomes permanent, communication is cancelled, and one is left with a low sense of oneself. The essence of true love can infact be compared to gift giving. The immeasurability of gift-giving, its wearying effects on the spirit when not reciprocated, can leave a person open to a tremendous sense of disappointment. This is just one of the risks a creative spirit takes in the world. Pursuing and maintaining romantic love is a risk too, but it is a wonderful risk, and it is the heavy price one might pay for it, that makes it so valuable in the first place.